Dating? What can I say I have a love/hate relationship
with dating, but since I've been writing about dating I decided that I should
follow my own advice. Last week I was
asked out by three different guys, and I didn't really want to go but I did. I know I'm surprised too (thanks to all my
wonderful friends who wouldn't allow me to cancel I really do appreciate
it!). I won't go into detail about all
of those dates, but let's just say that there weren't really any sparks! Plus there were some pretty awkward moments
if you get my drift? Since I've been dating more frequently it's really got me
thinking about what turns women off?
Looking at my past dating experiences these are some things that really
turn me off.
One of the
biggest turn offs for women is a guy who’s insecure about himself. If you’re
not confident about yourself or are feeling nervous, trust me, it shows. This
is one of the biggest reasons why guys get spurned on a date. Are you happy
being who you are? Do you think you make for great company? If you aren’t happy
being who you are, what are the odds that the girl you’re with would like your
company? Some guys have a great positive aura around themselves and some guys
are just plain nervous and scared. If you’re an insecure guy, it’s time to
change your behavior. Or lose the girl! Be who you are and be comfortable with
who you are becoming! Confidence not arrogance is a big turn on for any women!
Guys I know
most of your life you have been taught to be nice and chivalrous. Somewhere along the line, some guys take the
whole game of being chivalrous and experiencing the womanliness inside a man to
a whole new level. Drum roll… welcome… the sensitive guy. Sensitive guys are really nice guys who’ve
listened to their mama and have learnt their manners. They’re very much in
touch with the feminine side inside them, but they’ve been so rigorously
trained on connecting with their feminine side that they’ve crossed the line
and have gone way overboard. Watching a mushy movie with a guy and crying on
his manly shoulder is a great way for a girl to spend Sunday afternoon, but
sharing tissues to wipe each other’s tears? Nope, that’s just not right. Same
goes with guys who ask if a girl’s having a nice time a hundred times on a
date. There is
Some guys think
they have it all. And at some point, all the attention and the smothering from
their parents and buddies make them assume they own the world. They make
idiotic statements and love talking about their own glorious deeds or misdeeds.
Do you incessantly talk about how well you played a game or how many cars you
own? Well, say what you want, you’re
just going to be a cocky pompous prick. Even gold diggers may get bored of you
in no time. Learn some humility and you could still get back in a girl’s good
books. By bragging about how much money
your making or how intelligent you are can be a huge turn off for a woman.
Gosh, another
big one on the list. Have you ever met a guy who was just too boring? Now I
don’t mean nerdy or geeky, those types can be great guys and even better
boyfriend materials. I’m talking about boring guys whose company can kill you
in no time. All girls and guys have
experienced this at some point in their lives. We’ve all had to sit next to a
guy, and his conversations were so boring that you would rather jump off a
cliff. To avoid being a guy in this cliché, work your conversation around what
your date wants to talk about. If you see her looking around while you’re
talking, it’s time to change the conversation. If you see her eyes light up and
her gestures getting animated, you’ve hit the conversation jackpot, baby!
Are you a dumb
guy? Yeah, of course, you aren’t. But many guys are really dumb without
realizing it. Now I’m not talking about being an idiot or the village
simpleton. I’m talking about guys who speak their minds on a date, without
thinking about how their date would feel. If she’s looking around while you’re
talking, and you realize you need to change the topic of conversation, do it
discreetly. Don’t ever say, “Oh, you’re getting bored, aren’t you? You can tell
me, I won’t mind…” Unless you want your date to claw her nails into the leather
of her seat or crawl her toes in awkward cringing desperation, avoid being a
dumb guy.
Now we have the
mirror cracking good looking boy. Any guy who spends more time in front of the
mirror than his own girlfriend is a huge turn off. But we’re not stopping
there. If you’re having dinner with your date, and the waiter accidently spills
a bit of juice on your silk shirt, wipe it away like a man. Don’t whine about
how your silk shirt is ruined and behave like a drama queen. In the world of
dating, a narcissistic guy is one who’s overly bothered about his own things
like his cell phone, watch, or just about anything else that belongs to him.
Boy, you’re with a woman. Let her be the cynosure of your eyes!
Manner,
manners. Girls like a guy who knows his manners. Now every guy should know his
manners *though he should never push it and become the sensitive guy*. But
that’s not it at all. There’s something even bigger. You should be man enough
to apologize or accept that you’re wrong. No guy’s a bigger sore loser or a
turn off than a guy who just can’t accept his fault, but would rather throw
tantrums and make a fuss and pout like a four year old. Learn to man up and
remember, accepting that you’ve made a mistake is not a sign of weakness.
Don't get me
wrong I love meeting people and getting to know them, and am grateful for the
dating experiences. There are many good
guys out there that make wonderful dates!
It's just been a long couple of weeks of bad experiences!
Crystal Angel
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