I don't know if you know this or not, but when your 30 and single you go through a lot of heartbreak..... a LOT. One of the most frustrating things about being single at 30 is people don't always understand that YES, I have been in love before ( I only say this with a big "YES" because I was approached by one of my 20 year old cousin's who has ONLY dated 2 guys in her whole life who told me that I didn't know what it was like to be "IN LOVE"). What people don't realize is that when you are 30 and single you learn all about love. You learn what it is like to love someone unconditionally, to be in "LUST" with someone, to "LOVE" someone in a friend like way, to crush on someone, and to be "IN LOVE". Being single at 30 teaches you to love at all levels. Many of my best friends today are people I have dated in the past(yes, this can be a bit awkward at first). Learning about different types of love has been the most difficult and rewarding experience of my life. Unfortunately, when your heart aches for the loss of a relationship little by little you start guarding your heart more and more and MORE. If you know me it doesn't take a psychologist to realize that I have "TRUST" issues and may guard my heart more than I did when I was younger. This is not because I want to avoid a relationship or that "I'm jaded" when it comes to love. When your "in love" relationship" ends it's a painful experience, and if you haven't experienced this loss I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.
So, how can we guard out hearts correctly? The older we get the more comfortable we get and that goes for relationships. Sometimes we date people for just way too long or on the flipside not long enough. The thing that I wanted to focus on today is recognizing when people are "JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU". The longer we stay in a relationship the more damage we do to ourselves. Here are some sign's that the person you are dating may just not be in to you. I got this information from a book with that same title. They also made a movie about it. Plus I can't tell you how many times I heard this from my girlfriends when dating "some" guy (I forgot his name). LOL
10 Signs "He's just not that into you"
#1 Doesn't Share Personal InformationIf you're in a committed relationship you're going to swap personal information so that you know each other on a deeper level. This allows you to understand and strengthen your bond together. Men that don't plan on committing refuse to share this stuff. You don't know where he works. You don't know where he lives. You don't know if he has parents or siblings. You don't even know his last name. Keeping personal information hidden is a sign that he doesn't want you to know him that well so your relationship can't grow into anything further.
#2 You Aren't In His Future PlansWhen you're in a relationship that you plan on going the long run with, you change your future to make sure that you both are involved. You get a place together. You buy a car together. You may even go to the same school so that you can ride together to save on gas and money. You plan vacations and events together. Since you expect to still be going strong in the future, everything is done for two not one. If your guy is excluding you from his future plans then it's obvious he wasn't going to keep you around. He's still acting as if he was single which he probably will be when he reaches those goals. You went bye-bye way before then. He shouldn't be saying "I" all of time. They should start turning into "we" if he wants you apart of his life.
#3 Leaving the Relationship "Open"I mean open as in an open relationship. If he's dating around while dating you then it's obvious. Don't even bother listening to any of his twisted reasons for doing this. I've heard guys say they wanted to date around to get a good variety before choosing and so forth. If this wasn't agreed upon before you started dating then it shouldn't be accepted. If he doesn't stick with you from the start then he wasn't planning on being serious anyways.
#4 Doesn't Seem Interested in Your GoalsJust like how you want to be involved or at least know about his goals, he should want to know about yours. This way it shows he cares and maybe wants to help out. Your goals can affect the outcome of the relationship just as much as his so he wants to know. A guy that doesn't want to know probably doesn't need to. You aren't going to be around so why bother. Your family and your friends know of your goals. Maybe even some of your enemies so this really shows his lack of caring but again it doesn't matter. He wasn't trying to go far with you in the first place.
#5 He takes forever to text or email you back
In this technological age, there is nothing easier than sending someone a quick email or text. If your male companion takes hours — or even days — to respond to these simple forms of communication with even one line of acknowledgment, it’s time to kick him to the curb. This is not only lazy — it’s also rude. He might not be sending you a text message, but he is certainly sending you a clear message of another kind. On to the next one!
#6 He maintains physical and emotional distance
Does he often break eye contact, even in private? Or withhold sharing personal details about his life? On the physical and emotional levels, a guy who will not share just doesn’t want to go too deep. That can be fine for a fling, but it’s not worth making an emotional investment on your part. If you have had your fun, it’s time to move on to brighter horizons.
#7 He never comes over to your house
Men don’t like to go out of their way — especially if they are not that into you. A guy who likes you wants to make efforts to show you are special to him. Someone who won’t even drive to your house or take the subway can’t be expected to give much in the long term. There are other top-notch fish in the sea. Trust.
#8 He avoids touching you in public
If your guy friend loves to embrace, kiss and cuddle in the privacy of your home, but won’t even hold your hand on the street, this is a major warning sign. Either he doesn’t want to be seen as being "with" you, or he is scared one of his other lovers (or his wife!) will see you out in public. Drop this dude if he won’t even hold your hand.
#9 He rudely shoots down your ideas
A guy can disagree with your way of seeing the world and still care. If all he does is disrespectfully disregard your perspective when communicating, he likely doesn’t think much of you. You don’t want to be with someone who can’t treat you nicely, especially when you are simply talking. Next!
#10 He attends major events without you
Friend’s house party? Parents’ anniversary dinner? Maybe even his own birthday? Sometimes a man wants to maintain his independence. And at other times he wants to ensure that you don’t get too involved in his life so he can move on any time. If he never wants you around at a time of life that’s meaningful, you don’t mean that much to him. You also have better ways to spend your time — with family and friends who really care.
These are some of the signs. There are probably many more but I just can't think of them at the moment. This list is just for starters to give you an idea. Feel free to comment below with other idea's of how you know when someone is not that into you. Don't waste time waiting for someone who doesn't want to be with you. Go find a person who will treat you like the king or queen that you are! Have a nice day, and remember "GUARD YOUR HEARTS".
Love,
Crystal Angel
1 comment:
Kim says that this is too cute!! Thanks for making me laugh. Your amazing!
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